Wednesday, October 22, 2014


People claim to know what normal is or isn't. They know what it looks like. How the hell is that possible?

Normal doesn't look a certain way, it doesn't feel a certain way (potentially smells a certain way!). 

My heard desires for things I consider normal, a family to love me unconditionally, someone to hold my hand when I am feeling disconnected from the world around me, friends to tell me when I am messing up/ celebrate my successes/ and make me laugh when I am sad, 

Maslow's Hierachy of Needs suggests that we need certain things inorder to survive.

“Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner.”
Lao Tzu

This has never been my way of thinking. Growing up and moving around I rarely considered what other people thought of me. East Coast, MidWest, Pacific Northwest, or So Cal, they all had their trends and what was "cool" over the years, I preferred to march to the beat of my own drummer. Which reminds me of the quote from Walden.

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to music which he hears, however measured or far away."
- Henry David Thoreau

This makes me smile every time I read or say this Thoreau quote out loud. I have never wanted to be a drummer but have always made or heard my own music. I do things no one around me can or cares to do. One thing I have noticed recently is that I do what I think I should do instead of listening to my soul and doing what it longs for. Listening deep to our souls isn't easy and honestly I only get hints of what it's trying to tell me every now and again, but I keep listening for the message. I have been a prisoner of others on only 3 occasions that I can think of. First my step father, his immature view on the planet and having run our house like a dictator instilling valuable beliefs (sarcasm here) like "it's my house and if you don't like it there is the door." The second my significant other, believing that people should "act" a certain way instead of just listening to their hearts, I hope this person finds their own voice and stops listening to the parents. Lastly, the loudest, longest lasting, and most important voice has been my own. I have made myself a prisoner of my own thoughts and actions. Believing in my thoughts instead of creating my thoughts and believing in them as a conscious mind. As of October 21, 2014 I choose to manifest my own destiny with positive creative thoughts. I will construct a world the I deserve to be in and that loves me unconditionally. I challenge you to also do the same.